Somehow I don’t think Get Smart is going to be as funny without Don Adams but I’ll probably see it anyway. And Speed Racer. But in any case, The Head Honcho at the gym told me he’d buy me another cheeseburger if I beat 1min 40sec for 500m on my row tonight. I could hear Tina, (The Brains Behind the Gym) saying, “Oh no. Not this again.” Well, my row time was 1min 41.9sec. So I missed it by 1.9 seconds. And a guy who should have been rowing faster than me for the last month or so has finally passed me and I’m probably not going to catch up. He’s 12 years younger than me and I’m too lazy to score any steroids. I mean, really, what’s the point? If I get too strong then I could just RIP that mouse right out of its USB socket and then where would I be?

I’ve decided to give up cheese burgers until Mark (the guy whose diet I really should be emulating) gets a “muscle up.” I only say this because I KNOW HE’S READING THIS and I KNOW HE CAN DO IT. This probably just means I’ll eat something worse for me, but cheeseburgers are kind of my thing right now. I may actually like fried chicken more than cheeseburgers, now that I think of it. In any case, here it is in print, no cheeseburgers for me until Mark gets a muscle up.

In all honesty, I’ve been trying to work up to a muscle up for a while and I’m not even close to doing it. All this googling and research isn’t getting much closer to lifting my big ass over the “sticking point.”

Maybe it’ll be easier now that my wallet is $350 lighter. I bought tickets (or at least put my name in for the lottery) for NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball 1st & 2nd Round. Maybe I’ll be there. Maybe I’ll watch it on TV. We’ll see.