But what if she’s calling during House? I got two calls during the show. The first was from Arbitron, who somehow thinks that I’m going to do their bidding for the huge payment of $2. The second was from she-from-the-midwest-who-will-not-be-named coming back from one of them newfangled rocky-rolly shows. But it was during House! How could I talk to her? Well, even if I could use my non-existent charm, she’s a bazillion miles away in some foreign land of kielbasa and pierogi.

Now I’m hungry for pierogi. Feh.